When I traveled to Morocco, I had no expectations. I had no expectations because I did not know much about Morocco. All I knew was that they spoke French and it was a predominately Muslim country. As I boarded my flight from France, I wondered what I would find when I got there. It was like an empty slate in my mind. What followed for the next 8 days was traversing through one of the best countries I have ever experienced. I ventured through the medinas of Fez and Marrakesh. I explored the night markets and the beautiful colors of the Yves Saint Laurent Garden. I journeyed across the country in a hot boxcar of a train. I rode a dromedary and ate wonderful Moroccan cuisine on a local’s mountain rooftop. I hiked to a waterfall and tasted freshly juiced oranges. I experienced the beautiful night markets and the busy streets of Marrakesh. I wandered through the beautiful blue walls of Chefchaouen and toured the custom-made pottery stores in Fez.
It was amazing, overwhelming, beautiful, and easily the most fun I had ever had in a country. It wasn’t that bad things didn’t happen. It did happen. I got got for $500 on my second day there, I dealt with catcalls and people trying to finesse me at every turn, but I think that coming to Morocco without having expectations made it possible to weather those storms a lot easier. I was able to take it all in. However, suppose I had gone to Morocco with expectations and a notion of what it would be like in my head?
Suppose I had gone to Morocco with expectations of getting henna tattoos and seeing snake charmers, however, once I got there and didn’t get to experience those things, I became sour for my whole trip? Because the thing that I fixed my eye on, I did not experience? I would have missed out on all the beautiful things that I did get to experience. What if I’d gone to Morocco and decided that I hated the country. It would inform my future decisions to make sure that I don’t hold onto an experience that I don’t want to have again. One can make that mistake when they have expectations as well. Suppose one returned to Morocco repeatedly, even though they truly didn’t like the rest of the country, with the sole goal of getting to the snake charmer and henna tattoo? Expectations can be blinding.
I realized I could apply this logic to every experience. We experience places, we experience life, and we experience people. Expectations of experiences leads to disappoint and missed opportunities. Approaching situations with predatory notions or ideas of what you could get from places, people, or life based on appearances, stereotypes, and misinformed ideologies will ultimately lead to the experience being a failure. When you’re open minded, you can take in the good and bad and decide if a certain experience is right or wrong for you.
Loosening expectations can make life a lot easier to traverse just as it did when I explored Morocco. Having an open mind and truly seeing people, places, and everyday life for who and what it is allows the ebbs and flows that will eventually come with life easier to navigate. I was able to maximize on all the beauty I was surrounded by without limiting myself to one specific desire or guise. I didn’t miss out on any blessings and navigated the bruises because I could see everything clearly.
It is only by seeing all of something, including ourselves, in all its goodness and badness, that we can make the right choices. Expectations be damned.