Dear Jalani,
House sitting has been interesting. There are two guys who live here, and I don’t really like interacting with either of them. I always make sure to show people respect when I first meet them, but there’s nothing worse than someone who thinks they deserve respect and reverence just because they have a penis.
One day, I’m introducing myself and making it a point to be kind. Literally the next day, one of the guys got hella aggressive for no reason. He started being disrespectful and touching my food in the fridge and writing on my shit, all because he was intimidated. So, I banged on his door early in the morning when I saw what he was doing and woke him up. I made him explain why he was writing on my stuff and of course he started acting like a bitch and stammering and what not. He told me that they had shelves in the fridge and that I had put my stuff on his shelf. I told him that all he had to do was knock on my door and tell me that, but I guess that was too much for his little passive aggressive ass so he came outside and just like a man-child started moping and staring daggers like I would give a fuck.
That’s weird to me when people with penises want you to look at them and revere them as men when they aren’t actually men and exhibit childish behavior. I call these types of guys the “my penis is all I got,” type. They’re the type that haven’t achieved shit, and you can tell nobody raised them properly, so they go out into the world, and society tells them their dick makes them superior and special. Then when they meet someone who contradicts this idea and doesn’t subscribe to it, they spiral out of control and hang on to their wonderful dickliness as much as they can cuz their dick is all they have. Don’t let you be more accomplished than them either cuz, that’ll just break their little hearts.
The other roommate was cool. But then he would be weird and walk into the kitchen and ignore my presence. But then if he saw me walking toward him, he’d expect me to acknowledge him. So now I just ignore him altogether. I don’t do that hot and cold shit. It’s manipulative and I get the vibe that it’s rooted in subtle sexism as well. I’m not willing to play that game, and I’m proud of myself for that. There was a time when I’d just let the inconsistency ride, but I really can’t anymore. Not when I know what’s up and what that’s all about.
It really is all about people’s intentions now, and I just can’t do the fuckshit intentions. Since I’ve been here, they both act like they can’t do the simplest things like take out the trash. But I know that before I got here, they were taking out the trash. This idea that because I’m a woman, I’m going to come in and take care of all the household duties is insane. What type of relationships do these dudes hope to have by treating women like that? I don’t even get it. If you wanted to be seen as a man and not a little boy, wouldn’t you be busting your ass to show how competent you are rather than behaving like you can’t do shit all of the sudden. What woman would be attracted to that?
Strong women and weak men just don’t go together.
Anywho, just annoyed and venting. I guess it’s just tiring to deal with casual sexism and misogyny all the time. Like what is it like to hate on a person that means you no harm? Yet, at the same time, I’m not really confused at all. They don’t hate me; they hate themselves.
If you ever come across weak men, just turn around and run, nothing good comes of it. They just want to suck the life out of you and give you nothing in return. No, thank you.
Real men want to pour into you and help you; childish little boys just want a mommy for life that will make them feel special and labor after them like a slave. I wish I could slap both these dudes’ parents honestly.
Weak men shouldn’t even be allowed to breed.
Just the warning for you that I never got.
Love,
Alexa